If you are thinking of becoming a client of a Hakomi therapist or
a student in a Hakomi training, here is what you may experience.
ABOUT THE METHOD
Hakomi is based on the idea that much of our everyday suffering is unnecessary and is produced by unconscious beliefs that are irrelevant, untrue or out of date. The method is designed to bring these limiting or wrong ideas into consciousness. Hakomi is the method of assisted self study and discovery. Once these beliefs (memories, habits, emotions) are conscious, they can be examined and changed to offer a more satisfying way of being.
The Hakomi therapist pays very close attention to the way the client expresses him or herself nonverbally. Such things as the tone of voice, movements, gestures, posture, and facial expressions are usually very significant indicators of beliefs and unconscious material. On the basis of those observations, the therapist creates little experiments (often just a statement) that are done with the client in a mindful state. Such experiments may evoke reactions, often emotional ones. When evoked, memories, beliefs, and associations may emerge which help the client realize something about themselves. As Moche Feldenkrais used to say, we can not do what we want until we know what it is we are actually doing.
What to expect: This method is not about talking about your problems. Your history is written in the way you do things now, your style, your defining characteristics. So, you can expect that the therapist will be looking and listening for these and will bring them to your attention as part of setting up the little experiments in mindfulness that are the core of the work. The therapist will also be genuinely kind and patient, safe, caring, and non-judgemental. The vulnerability and openness that mindfulness entails require an extremely safe environment. You can expect to bring up emotions. The therapist knows how to be with you when this happens and knows how to offer comfort and help you understand.
What You Need: You need to be willing to be with your own present experience. Your reactions to experiments in mindfulness will be the basis of the work you do. So, you need to be willing to stay focused on your experience. You need to be open to going into mindfulness, which is calm, inwardly focused state, to simply witness yourself and what happens inside you. You might experience some painful emotions on the way to finding out how to relieve your unnecessary suffering and let go of the limiting beliefs and habitual old patterns. You need to be willing to speak about yourself as you feel now. This work is not about asking questions, problem solving or making conversation. The courage you have to be open and honest in looking at yourself are your greatest allies.
The rewards will be a deeper understanding of yourself and others, greater pleasure in everyday living, and richer, happier relationships. Self study can create all that.
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